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Wisdom in Friendship

Wisdom in Friendship


Proverbs 18:24; 27:17 and various scriptures

One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin,

    but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother 

(Proverbs 18:24)


A friend loves at all times

But a brother is born for adversity  

(Proverbs 27:17)


Wisdom is being so in touch with reality that you know what you should do. Sometimes you have many options that are all moral, but which is the wise one?  

The theme today is friendship.  

1. True friendship is necessary for wisdom 

You will not be successful in life if you don’t become good at choosing friends. You will not be a wise person, proverbs says unless you are really go at finding, forging and keeping friendship. 

One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin 

There is no such thing as a “self made person”.  In the early part of your life you were who your parents made you and in the later part of your life you became who your friends made you. 

2. True friendship emerges from common purpose 

The very condition of having Friends is that we should want something else besides Friends. Where the truthful answer to the question "Do you see the same truth?" would be "I see nothing and I don't care about the truth; I only want a Friend," no Friendship can arise - though Affection of course may. There would be nothing for the Friendship to be about; and Friendship must be about something, even if it were only an enthusiasm for dominoes or white mice. Those who have nothing can share nothing; those who are going nowhere can have no fellow-travellers.”  (C.S. Lewis in Four Loves)

3. True friendship has to be cultivated

A friend loves at all times,

    and a brother is born for a time of adversity.

Proverbs 27:17

9 Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart,

    and the pleasantness of a friend

    springs from their heartfelt advice.

(Proverbs 27:9)

4. True friendship requires emotional intelligence  

To be a good friend you need to be emotionally Intellegent enough to read the emotions of others. 

Seldom set foot in your neighbor’s house—

    too much of you and they will hate you.

Proverbs 25:17


anyone loudly blesses their neighbor early in the morning,

    it will be taken as a curse. (Proverbs 27:14)


18 Like a maniac shooting

    flaming arrows of death

is one who deceives their neighbor

    and says, “I was only joking!”  (Proverbs 26:18-19)

5. True friendship produces growth 

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another (Proverbs 27:17)

6. True friendship is modeled in Christ

At the end of his life, Jesus said this to his disciples:

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends. (John 15:12-15)

That statement reveals the meaning of the universe.  God created us to be our friends.  When God walked in the garden with Adam, that phrase “walking” points to friendship.   We were created for community.  God is in his nature, community.  

In the ultimate act of friendship.  Christ died for us so that we could be brought into friendship with God.  

Discussion Questions:

  1. Why is friendship necessary to a person's life?
  2. Why do you believe friendship is necessary for wisdom?
  3. What does it take to cultivate friendships?
  4. What does our need for friendship say about how we were created?
  5. How does Christ model friendship? 




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